This is for all the brave people who don’t want to sacrifice their favorite candy to fit a stereotype.
I don’t know how your impression is, but I always seem to find conflicting statments when I open up a beauty magazines. At first I see topics of self empowerment and being comfortable in your own skin, but then when I flip the pages I see ridiculous weight loss adverts and depictions of models whose bodies are probably photoshopped. I’m really angry about these double standards as you are able to read how to accept yourself in the same magazine which a week ago stated how to loose 15 pounds in 10 days; the same magazine who showcases the best cupcake recipes and places to go for dining, the same magazine who adverts a slim-fast diet product which looks disgusting as hell. Are you kidding me?
To be honest, I love size Zero. I love and envy the girls for their beautiful underarms who look like the ones you see in commercial for charity donations for poor children in need of money to prevent starving to death. They too can easily reach around their arm with thumb and finger one time with fingers touching – a beauty goal many anorexia patients can do at ease. I love if you see the bone structure hiding under the skin where no fat protects them from being exposed. I like to see that, I would like to have that, I hate myself for what I´m writing here right now.
OHH FUCK! I stepped right into the size zero trap
So sometimes we know beauty standards are sick but they have already influenced our minds, the way we judge, the way we think and what we value as beautiful. You never tell a fat girl she’s too fat, but you always tell a slim girl she’s too slim. Both are not healthy, but one of the two things we can say, as it implies a compliment. The girl will grin and respond “aww stop it you, I´m not”. Which gets to an even worse level when she thinks that’s actually the case.
I never met a girl who said she was slim enough but I met so many girls that were slim enough, so where is the mistake?
Why do we put beauty standards to a limit no one or only few can reach, and this included with all sacrifices being super small brings along? Maybe to motivate us to do more and do the best out of what God gave us, or maybe just to torture ourself for reasons I cannot think of. I don’t look like a girl in a magazine, but I think I’m fucking beautiful enough.
My new NO, NO, NO philosophy.
That´s when I realized I want to stop moaning about my body. No, no, no why am I so small (well then I´m cute). No, no, no why am I not as curvy as other girls (pfff again: I´m cute, and so is every part of me). No, no, no my skin is super sensitive (guess what? I may feel it more intense if someone I love hugs me!).
I am good the way I am.
Mien, Hallgarten not willing to give up on chocolate, crackers or any kind of sweets.
I have big eyes, which I like, and a nice smile on my face when my friends make jokes about everything (mostly me). As I’m not perfect (like everyone) I don’t want someone to see my mistakes in the first order but someone who sees my benefits. I think that is a task when falling in love: It’s so easy to love someone who is perfect, it’s so much more worth to love someone except or even for his/her little mistakes. And that makes the best stories. Think of your friends, don’t you love them for their bad habits?
Apart from this ugly beauty-standard-level starved anorexia model I just can’t sacrifice my only life (as I’m informed) that way.
Life is too short to live without chocolate.
I love licorice, I love sweets, I love doughnuts. I fucking love doughnuts and if a man won’t accept me the way I am, I will definitely not share my doughnut with him. So how can we love ourselves and love what we eat without guilt? I know what many people think: We need role models. Jennifer Lawrence for example is awesome in the way she addresses this unhealthy beauty standard and fights against it. So several stars are role models, and I personally think Jennifer is one of them, but several people proclaim standards they don’t apply for themselves, which makes the whole picture ironic. We see, we can have role models, and it’s great to have them but we cannot rely on them.
Why not be your own role model?
Yesterday I saw a beautiful girl in Düsseldorf on the street wearing vintage styled high waist jeans while shopping. She was slim yes, but in an absolutely normal way and looked hot and pretty in her outfit. Not only I couldn’t stop staring but also every man turned their necks towards her. I thought about those street style pictures (which I follow regularly on Facebook), where they upload random stylish people on the streets. They would pass her by without even a glimpse because in their eyes such a beautiful girl would be too big. But in my eyes she was prettier than any other model on their page. This new perception of beauty persuaded me to change my previous opinion on being the model “skinny girl” and guided me too a much healthier and more realistic standard of beauty. I no longer want to chase other people’s standards of beauty, but have my own standard because this is the kind of girl I want to be .
My new no-diet diet
I don´t want girls to envy me (where is the value in that?), I want to encourage and inspire people of all genders & ages that living normally and being pretty is not a tradeoff. I want to live these standards for them and for moments I feel bad for eating candy or for moments when I’m judging my body that is totally perfect, normal and beautiful the way it is.
And again: If someone doesn’t appreciate your inner and outer beauty, he/she shall go to hell where no doughnuts exists, as that is what he/she deserves.
Some of my favorite role models…
In the following let me introduce you my very inspiring and brave friends and their favorite candy. None of them is willing to give up on these particular sweets so if you ever need more role models – they support a world I want to live in.
Sandra, Oestrich-Winkel, enjoying cholocate-fondue with her best friends.
“Kein Genuss ist vorübergehend, denn der Eindruck den er hinterlässt ist bleibend.”
(No enjoyment is preliminary as its impression is remaining)
Lucas, Hallgarten, snacking chocolate cookies at my place.
“Krümmel, Krümmel, Krümmel”
Nadine Mercedes, Luxemburg, enjoys her hot caramel chocolate.
“Chocolate is the answer, who cares what the Question is!”
Avril, Hallgarten, loves dark chocolate.
“Dark chocolate is healthy like me!“
Nina, Munich, can’t life without pralines.
“The Chocolate Collection“
Franzi, Frankfurt, can’t make a tradeoff when it comes to nougat-pralines & chocolate chips.
“I simply can´t decide which I love more, nougat or chocolate chips“
Karo, Erbach, Hanuta.
Annie, Oestrich-Winkel, Milka & Kinderriegel
“Ich telefoniere mit meinen Kindern”
(I´m calling my kids)
Ana, Chile, candy-pops
“IIII love candy”
Ronya, Berlin, Hanuta
Mone, Berlin, Snickers
“Have a break, have a
Jessi, Vienna, Giotto.
Vici, Marocco, Kinder Ü-Ei
Ivana, Frankfurt, loves the nostalgic Kinder Riegel
Suraj, Oewi’s famous REWE, Milka & Oreos
Jana, Düsseldorf, ice cream
Clothilde, Düsseldorf, Oeufs de Motette by Larnicol
“Salty chocolate caramel memories”
Annika, Oewi, chocolate brownie & vanilla ice cream
Who inspires you? Your mum? Your friends? Or boyfriend?
Let me know and feel free to share a picture of you and your favorite candy on my Facebook page or tag Miencuisine on Instagram!
Let’s make this world a little more tolerant together.